EVEN IF IT TAKES FOREVER...

‘Am gonna wait for you even it takes forever, ever, ever everrr’…Lemar’s wait forever song blurred out my speakers. By now you all know music is my greatest inspiration, my iTunes is my muse and Lemar’s words opened a new world of thoughts of men. You know what? When a man wants you, he wants you forever. I direct a lot of my posts to the ladies because in the relationship world ladies often get the shorter end of the stick and wonder why it is so. You want to know how waiting for you forever rings true in the man’s world? Think of that guy that has loved you since the day he laid eyes on you. To be honest at least 8 out of 10 women have that guy. Although he has become the ‘brother’ guy, the ‘very good friend’ guy, the ‘can do anything for me’ guy the 'even if it is at 3am and he has to drive 2miles to take you out because you just realised you’re bored kinda' guy They are often there even after you get married and you find yourself calling them when you have troubles. They are there even when they get married to access the new guy on your case and see if he’s good enough for you. Although you fail to see this, they will love you till their dying day whether you end up together or not. Everybody has true love in their sphere the question is how many people are fearless enough to take the bull by the horn?

You have love flaunting itself and throwing itself on you but was love fair enough to you? Sometimes cupid can be so horrible, the people it targets its arrows on are just not the ones we want for ourselves or maybe the guy you wanted dodged the arrow, maybe he bent to pick a pin, maybe,  just maybe he didn’t want love or maybe sadly enough he didn’t want love with you. ‘Bad boys ain’t no good, good boys ain’t no fun’ like Mary J simply put. The fact of the matter is you missed out on true love and now have to settle for conditional love, a ‘substitute lover’ like Estelle puts it. Well I am not writing for you to cry over spilled coffee, I mean since you’re in a ‘situation’ relationship now, you might as well make it work for your own good and hopefully make up for your lost dream. The most important thing to get by with is trust, respect for each other and great communication. With these you both can move a mountain and create a new dream.

The issue of trust goes beyond just suspecting that that girl at his work he’s always chatting with on the phone is he’s side chic. Rather it’s in your psyche; someone raised the issue of checking messages, emails, passwords and records to see if he’s not straying. This era where locks are on everything; the doors, the computers, the phones, the ipads, and even the man it is hard to tell how many people have the keys. I’ll say this technically if he hasn’t proposed to you, he’s everybody’s man, and as far as it goes he hasn’t promised you anything. His word is the only bond you have, hold on to it and leave the phones and passwords alone. The locks are there for a reason, often times the locks were there before you came along and he may not even be thinking about it in the way you are.

There is a reason for everything and a time and season for everything, if you’re comfortable enough to give

the man you’re dating your password, remember that this was your choice. You’re not in the position to impose your beliefs and choices on others. If he shares his with you; good. If he doesn’t; respect his privacy. It may not even be women it could be there are family issues he doesn’t want you knowing about. He could be protecting you from stressing yourself over women who want him and he wants nothing to do with. Basically he has not reach that comfortable place you have reached to share some things with you. Give him time, the time length doesn’t matter, it’s the mind that matters. It could take him 2weeks, it could take him 4years but it doesn’t mean he loves you less.

Checking his messages and call logs would do you no good, any cheating man is smart enough to delete any of these records, and you will never find what you’re looking for. If you do find what you are looking for, it means you always knew it was there to find and now that you’ve found it, am sure you also know what to do with it, I can’t help you here; I wasn’t the one snooping around. To be fair though, there was a time I had no password of my man’s business, now I have all his passwords, his bank pin, we share one ipad that am with 98per cent of the time and I see all his emails and transactions plus balances first hand, I didn’t even have to ask, the wisest way to get what you want is to act like it means nothing to you, trust me it will be handed to you on a platter of gold. Another thing you shouldn’t do is answer his phones; if the person wanted to speak with you they will call your phone, after all if you weren’t there the phone will ring and nobody will die if it isn't answered. Wonder why there is a call log that tags ‘missed call’? I bet you never thought about that.  Bottom line is everything you want to know about your man with good patience and trust, he will tell you himslef, slowly but surely so put your mind at rest.