REBOUND!!!

The easiest way to get over someone is to get under someone else, until 3 years down the line you are still getting under someone else and unfortunately you’ve been under 7 ‘someone elses’ and yet till not over that someone. Now settle down… the only thing rebound is good enough for is easing your mind for a period of time and helping you believe ‘you are too hot to be cold’ (lol! sorry I just had to say that) except for one thing though; that heartbreak left your heart cold enough to be stone and too scared to open up to love and be loved in return. The only rule to finding true love is to be true to yourself, there are no rules to avoiding heartbreaks but the rule to surviving it is by admitting you are broken hearted. The first pain that strikes your heart when you realise you’ve been played is the shame that surrounds it. You start to think of every reason why you held the short end of the stick, you can’t imagine why a mere mortal cannot see you for the amazing person you are, you begin to remember how much effort you put into the relationship just to make it work and how that will seem pointless now to the third party listening because in as much as everyone says you will be fine, something rings constantly in your head telling you; ‘you just weren’t good enough’.

That 'ring' is why you try to prove to yourself that you are good enough for anyone and the real reason why a rebound follows, then a rebound for your rebound and a rebound for your rebound’s rebound and before you know it you’ve been single for a long haul and can’t be bothered to try out a real relationship. Getting a heart break doesn’t make you less of a human; it doesn’t make you bad, it doesn’t make you worthless, it doesn’t make you unlovable, it only and very simply means you tried out a relationship and it didn’t work; quite simply. The fact that you tried at all means that you are confident enough to take a risk and that act in itself makes you good enough for anything you put your mind to and good enough for anybody in actual fact. You have to agree with me that it is not every relationship that ends with someone cheating on another, you should know that there is a reason for everything that happens. 

If your man or woman starts acting like he/she can’t be bothered and is getting bored of the relationship, take it for just that; they can’t be bothered and they’re bored. They are not acting out they’re making you read their minds through their actions. A lot of people are not bold enough to speak their mind, mainly due to the fact that they simply don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings so they act it out and hope you get the message without them having to say a word. But do you think it is fair to keep someone in a relationship they have lost all interest in? Isn’t it better to have someone that has the same interest in you as you in them? So if your other seem like they’re losing interest, take it in good fate and know that it is better to be in a happy and peaceful atmosphere than to spend the rest of your days in a tense one. I’ve seen a lot of couples interact and trust me, you could cut the tension with an axe, forget knife. Situations like these saddens me and you begin to wonder if that is what love and marriage is about, luckily for you and I; we know it isn't. 

So here’s what am saying, rather than find someone to replace your lost love and get heart-broken all over again,  why not focus on the simple things that make you happy; like getting in shape, going to the movies with friends, reading books, listening to music and going out to eat and simply just having a good time. Try to find yourself, think of what makes you happy and what you would like to do, get into crafts(i.e. making beads, learning to sew, decorating) anything that will take your mind off the pain and give you some fulfilment, you could even start up a blog, I promise to be a die hard follower. I remember when I was broken hearted; I constantly racked my brain on why exactly it happened and why it had to be me. I cried for many months, I wrote a 4 page letter to my ex I never sent, I listened to Shakira’s 'oral fixation' album every day and applied every track in it to my situation and cried myself to sleep every night. But I also applied myself by writing on a note pad the honest truth about the relationship, I wrote the pros and cons, I wrote the happy and sad times and I wrote a projection of how the next ten years of life will be if I had continued in the relationship. By the time all these was done, I realised I was better off out than in the relationship. So my dears, to be honest it’s not all bad, you just need to be determined to get maximum fulfilment in life and live happily, for you deserve it.